Your Identity is More Than “Mom”

It’s easy to feel like who you are gets lost in your role as Mom. It can feel all-consuming–especially at certain stages–to the point that you wonder if you even have an identity outside these little people that are completely dependent on you.

I think that leaves some of us wonder, who am I?

I don’t have time for hobbies. My friends’ calendars never sync up with mine. Chances are I’m working, feeding my kids, cleaning my house, or mindlessly sitting in front of the TV–too tired to do anything productive, but not wanting to give into sleep yet because this is “my time.”

I get it. You start to wonder if you have an identity beyond the day-to-day.

What’s Your Identity–Other Than Mom?

The good news is, your role as mother doesn’t define you. The constant laundry you can never quite get folded and back into drawers isn’t who you are. This is a season of your life, but your identity isn’t wrapped up in it.

You’re His Workmanship

Ephesians 2:10 tells us:

For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them.

Defining Workmanship

What exactly is a workmanship? That’s not a word I’ve heard frequently. Some translations use the word masterpiece there instead. But I thought it was really interesting to hear how Brant Hansen explained it on his podcast a couple of weeks ago:

Did you know you’re a poem? It says that in scripture. It says that you’re the workmanship of God, you’re God’s handiwork. But the word there is Greek, it’s poiēma. And it really means a work of art, it’s where we get the word “poem.” You’re God’s work of art, He’s the artist. You’re a work of art (beginning at 1:20).

God carefully, expertly, intentionally created you and breathed life into you. He expressed His creativity through you and has a plan for you. And your identity as His work of art isn’t dependent on how the world sees you in your role as Mom:

You’re not all these things our culture says…all of that identity that they put on you pales in comparison to what you are, which is a work of art. You can’t get a better identity than that, and that’s a stable one. God is not going to change (beginning at 4:44).

God Treasures You

Not only are we God’s work of art, but He treasures us, He loves us deeply, and He has a plan for us, even in this season of life that we’re in.

I love how my husband explained it when he preached on this section of Ephesians. I’d recommend you give his whole sermon a listen since he explains a lot more than I do here, but to quote a few points that stood out to me:

[God] demonstrates the greatest love when He offered himself as a sacrifice for sinners. It’s this unbelievable love, this favor that He’s shown to us as His followers known as the church, that we are His most prized possession in His treasure trove of heaven. And He has plans for us…

Jesus is the one that makes the first move. He’s the one that’s been vulnerable. He’s the one that pursues us…

We have been created and blessed to be a walking, talking demonstration of God’s grace. His loving kindness to the world.

The greatest love ever is Jesus’ sacrifice. He made this sacrifice because He loves us so much–we’re His most prized possession. He said, “I love you” first, knowing exactly who we are, flaws and all.

Why is it important to root our identity in God?

First of all, seeing our identity in God helps us rejoice and be grateful in all circumstances. We aren’t dependent on the people and situations around us for happiness. No matter what happens, we can see ourselves as valuable, precious, and designed for a specific reason–even if we don’t know what that is right now.

Also, our kids are watching. In a world where kids feel pressure to look and act a certain way at younger ages than we did, we need to model where we find our value and confidence. My value isn’t based on the number on the scale, my career growth, or how good I look on social media. It comes from the Creator of the universe, who decided He wanted me to be part of His creation.

Who Am I?

In those times where I need that reminder about who I am and where my identity is rooted, I like to listen to Casting Crowns’ Who Am I?

Video

Lyrics

Who am I, that the Lord of all the earth
Would care to know my name
Would care to feel my hurt?
Who am I, that the bright and morning star
Would choose to light the way
For my ever wandering heart?

Not because of who I am
But because of what You’ve done
Not because of what I’ve done
But because of who You are

I am a flower quickly fading
Here today and gone tomorrow
A wave tossed in the ocean
A vapor in the wind
Still You hear me when I’m calling
Lord, You catch me when I’m falling
You’ve told me who I am
I am Yours

Who am I, that the eyes that see my sin
Would look on me with love
And watch me rise again?
Who am I, that the voice that calmed the sea
Would call out through the rain
And calm the storm in me?